A date with melancholy

Tags

Babbling, Melancholy

I’ve known for a while that I’d need a day like today. One is enough, or I’ll need another in some time. Today I took a long walk. I let the wind chill me and sweep the melancholy over me. When I came home I was weary. My blood sugar was low, I was quite dehydrated and at my lowest. It was done intentionally.

Now I’m wrapped in a big blanket, I got my cup of tea and a wee bit of bitter chocolate. I am taking a day off, off from everything and everyone. Tonight I’ll only think about myself. I’ll only care about myself. I’ve immersed myself in melancholy and I’ll stay until I wake up tomorrow morning.

I’m not sad, my life is good. But today I will let everything that has been less than ok for the past months linger inside my head. I will relive every painful moment, deal with it and let it go. I’ve worked hard and I haven’t achieved everything I wanted to. I still have a long way to go and a steep hill to climb. Some things I have to let go in order to move on. For certain things I didn’t get the closure I wanted, tonight I’ll close them on my own.

I’m born with a good dose of determination. I have enough inspiration to last a lifetime. I have a few cans left of motivation, but I’ll wait until tomorrow before I open them. Tonight it’s just me and my melancholy, a big blanket, a cup of tea and some mushy songs.

A sign of life…

I’m miles from where you are,
I lay down on the cold ground
And I, I pray that something picks me up
and sets me down in your warm arms

Two weeks of being a single parent is now coming to an end. Wonderful Husband is coming back tomorrow, and life might return to normal. My blogging shows the spare time I’ve had for the past weeks. I’ve started a second course at Uni, and it requires quite a lot of work. The few hours I’ve had while Son has been blissfully sleeping have been dominated by sentences of this kind:

 

“Earlier studies also suggest that oral proficiency, metalinguistic awareness, and general cognitive development are crucial skills for literacy acquisition”

 

I know a lot more about bilingual children learning to read since last time I posted here, knowledge that might come in very handy some day 😉 I’m also behind on the work on my thesis because of various reasons connected to personal illness over the holiday (see, I’m not complaining, that was just stating a fact. But you are allowed to feel a little sorry for me). I am afraid my poor supervisor is having as many sleepless nights as I have (though lately sleepless night have given way to restless sleep full of weird dreams mostly containing said supervisor and different types of failed projects, last night it was a pizza I was not able to finish…).

 

Son is loving each day, as always, but struggling a bit to get into his normal sleeping pattern after a few nights of disturbed sleep. His favourite new word is no. Though the word is not used very often, his actions often match the meaning. Today after refusing to have his diaper changed, he kicked and screamed and started crying when I told him off, and that he was hurting me when he kicked like that. This was before kindergarten. Going home, he fell asleep in the car and I carefully carried him to his bed for his nap. He woke up when I put him in his bed. As I wrapped his duvet around him he looked up at me with his big blue eyes and said:

Son: Mama?

Me: yes?

Son: Me kick mama, mama au.

I had to think for a second to remember the moment earlier.

Me: Yes, that hurt.

Son: Sowee…

 

My heart melted and Son is now allowed to do as he please whenever he wants.

 

 

Starting everyday-life

Tags

Everyday life

The new year starts today in my case. Or not really the new year, but the real life of the new year. There’s not much troubling my mind about the new year, well, I am a little anxious about finishing, or being able to finish, my studies, my thesis, and the end of an era; my student life.

I dag starter det nye året for min del. Ikke akkurat det nye året, men det nye årets hverdag. Det er ikke mye som bekymrer meg angående de neste 12 månedene, eller, jeg grubler selvfølgelig en del på fullførelsen av studiene, om og når,  oppgaven, studiene og slutten på en era; mitt liv som student.

Son with two of his cousins, loving the attention

 

There is however one thing, that will be a challenge from the first minutes of this day. Both Son, Husband and I need to get back into the a normal rhythm when it comes to food, sleeping and housework. Every time Son is hungry now he asks for a cookie, not that cookies have been his sole source of nutrition, but it would be if he could decide.

Det er allikevel en ting som vil være utfordrende fra morgenen i dag. Både Sønn, Mannen og jeg trenger å komme tilbake i normal døgnrytme, og våre normale vaner når det gjelder måltider, søvn og husarbeid. Hver gang Sønn er sulten nå er det kakemann han spør etter, ikke at kakemenn har vært hovednæringskilde de siste ukene, men det hadde vært det hadde han bestemt.

 

We have been surrounded by people during the holiday, and Son has been entertained throughout every single day. Having no one but his parents around for the days he’s not in kindergarten will be quite a change. I think he’l be happy to get back into normal routines again, and he usually seems to enjoy solitude at times. I am sure he will easily adapt to the new old routines, but as a mom I am allowed to worry a little bit, aren’t I?

Vi har omgåtts folk hver dag hele ferien og Sønn har blitt underholdt fra morgen til kveld. Det å plutselig være alene store deler av dagen med bare mamma og pappa blir nok litt av en omveltning. Jeg tror han både vil ha godt av og nyte de nye gamle vanene, men jeg lurer litt på hvor enkelt det blir å gjeninnføre dem. Han venner seg nok fort til det, men som mor må jeg vel bekymre meg litt?

The Dinner Challenge

Tags

Challenge, Dinner, Food

It’s Sunday again and I am once again face to face with my form/list of next week’s dinners. Unfortunately I often feel like I am repeating some dinners over and over again. Of course, it is only natural, as some dishes are easy to make, the entire family likes them and they are good, healthy meals. But it gets boring.

So here is a small challenge for you, answer these questions, or some of the questions. Either as a comment to this post, or make a post about something similar where you answer these at your blog.

1. What dish do you feel like you repeat most often?

I feel like I very often serve boiled, lightly salted codfish with boiled potatoes and carrots. I am not very creative when it comes to codfish.

1. What is your favourite everyday dinner?

These days it would be a dinner that makes itself and cleans itself. Last time that happened I had homemade cauliflower soup with bacons, sausages and broccoli. I love soups during the cold seasons.

1. What dinner is you childrens’(husband’s, boyfriend’s, wife’s, girlfriend’s) favourite?

My husband would probably prefer a good steak, I think, with a butter based sauce, gratinated potatoes and boiled vegetables. Son is not that much of a dinner person, but the last meal he truly loved was the homemade fish fingers.

 

As we all probably have dinners that often find their ways to the dinner table, if there are gathered we’ll have a list of healthy, easy and tasty dinners.

 

Bad day gone good

Tags

Autumn, Horse, Husband, Outside, Walking

This morning didn’t start out too good. It’s one of those mornings where everything goes wrong, and it didn’t stop after I left the house. I was in my office, and just had to go out for two minutes. When I came back the door turned out to have locked itself as I closed it. It’s an old lock, apparently not of the best quality and lose enough to manage to lock itself just because of the movement of the door being closed. My keys were inside my office, and I knew that if I left the building I wouldn’t be able to get back in. Luckily I met the cleaners just before they were about to leave and they were able to get me back in.

I tried to end the bad karma of the morning by walking home again. A good walk always brightens my mood. I met this guy and his friend on the way. He saw me coming some metres away and ran up to the fence to greet me. As I walked by I walked up to the fence to pet him, and as soon as I was about to touch him, he bent his head down and started eating, pretending I wasn’t there. Odd behaviour I must say, even for a horse!

Back home Husband surprised me with home made cauliflower soup with fresh baguettes, yum! It was his first time to make it from scratch, but it was sooo good. He had also cleaned most of the house. What a great husband I have!

One downside to walking home though; I haven’t done much of it lately, so I am now suffering. The pain!! (only sore muscles, and the feeling is still good)